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You were somehow toxic but I fell in love with you…

“I have thought of you a lot, today.

So often, I have missed you.

It’s inexplicably hard what happened. You were toxic, but I fell in love with you.

Some said you were a sinner, a manipulative golden man, a narcissist. But I didn’t trust their judgment.

I trusted the memory, the ghost of you, who you were in our beginnings. I trusted the memory of when you were at your highest, your kindest, your most loving.

So often, I have wondered if this version of you was real. I sometimes feel that after that beginning, I never saw “you” again.

I remember that I fell in love with the way that you looked at me. Your promises, too.

You see, I didn’t know exactly what love was in those innocent times. I wanted passion, I wanted to be impressed. I wanted someone that was magnetic.

Love, I thought, was fire and sparks. But I know now that love is also presence, staying, understanding one another—feeling safe and protected.

I know now that I misunderstood the idea of love; that’s why I found you.

I thought that our love would be crazy, because you were one in a million—so special and free. But the way you disappeared was one in a million, too.

As time passed, you refused to talk—even a word—about us. You decided to go without any proper farewell.

You chose to erase me.

…”

Go Here to read the rest of the blog. Of course, feel free to message me if this resonates!

Much love,

Sophie

 

 

A SHORT CHANNELLED MESSAGE DIRECTLY IN YOUR INBOX? 

Hi Friends,

How are you feeling during this Eclipse time? We are moving through such a powerful start of the summer.

You could feel that your energy is being drawn to very new ways of thinking, being in the world, working & sharing your gifts.

Things, people & places that you felt very close to or attached to even recently could feel faraway, or dramatically fading. A new path is possible. Feelings around your Twin Soul & the possible destination of this connection / pathway to Reunion could be changing & evolving towards a higher level of love & maturity.

Whenever lost, ask yourself:

Which path is the most self-loving, self-empowering & serving the communities that matter most to you? Your bonding & sense of “this holds meaning or not” as far as family, tribe, groups of friends or relationships could now entirely be reshaped. Groups that almost had no importance to you, could start & become of a paramount relevance for your healing & path of personal liberation.

Where do you feel that you had abandoned yourself by having restricted perspectives & glasses of the world?

Which long standing issue or cycle could be approached in a brand-new way?

What is coming back up which started or unfolded in 2002/2003? How do you wish to approach things differently now?

Where soul can show that it has reached a greater level of maturity?

To respond to needs of guidance & insights, without the need for you to connect at a specific time of your day through a video call — I have created the following offering:

Intuitive Channelled Recordings (10/15 min length):

They provide intuitive insights, an intuitive read of your situation, as well as distance Healing sent through Reiki.

These are sent with a spread of 3 Tarot cards also explaining what I felt and saw from another perspective. The price is of 44€.

The reading is sent directly to your email box with the cards & the recording — within the 24/48h following your purchase.

You may send me a short question, inquiry or situation that you want to investigate about — and I will read from there (even if the share is very short).

To ask for more information or arrange your reading, write me directly here: sophieanna.gregoire@gmail.com.

A Letter to Younger Me: He Didn’t Break You.

Dear Twin Flames, you will find a new writing below. Designed for the hard times of the Twin Souls Journey.

When it’s tough, we we lose hope. A reminder that we always recover from love, even this one… perhaps, until it comes back…

“I thought I would spend a life not being in love, because of our love.

I thought no other man would have eyes of that same blue.

I thought nobody else would feel so close.

None of these were true.

It’s funny, yet so beautiful, how life is—one day you think you are dead, that you already passed away—but you aren’t.

You think that life has left you, but it didn’t.

You think love only had one name—it doesn’t.

One day he leaves and you see yourself laying on the floor, breathless, lifeless, desireless, hopeless, futureless. You think you lost everything that was you—but in fact, at that exact moment that you thought you were forever laying there, you were up. And you became something you never were before in your life.

A broken heart that stood up.”

Read the whole blog Here. 

Much love,

Sophie

You Gave Me the Sex that I Wanted.

Read below my latest blog on love, intimacy & sacred sexuality: 

I had always been looking for somebody who would be both primal and sensitive. Connected to his heart and strong. Deeply present, loving and nurturing and soft — and wild too. Sexual. In his power. 

That was you.

I have thought and talked a lot about sacred sex in timebut as an idea, because I didn’t know until I found you. 

Until that point I believed that a man, in the bedroom as in life, was either too soft, too tender, and even reserved — or conversely dominant, disconnected from his heart and possibly there, in the bed with you, more for the performance and the fact of making the woman orgasm  partly in order to reinforce his own pride.

Before you, the men of my life may have had technique — but they lacked presence. 

Some can miss the key point, which is: doing the love making with you, deeply connected to you — in response to your opening, to your love.

*

It’s funny because now that I’m typing this, I realize that the reason why our sexual life is so beautiful, to me, is because you gave me the love that I longed for. 

It is because of the trust that we built together that my body agreed to let you lead. 

It is because you were always present, consistent, reliable and sure, that you didn’t meet any resistance within my body, within my soul.

….”

 

Read more of the post Here !

Much love and gratitude,

Sophie

Art: @_kallenmikel

 

I No Longer Need You.

This is again a personal share about how I happened to detach, to lose attachment and this in a positive “way” for my soul mate. How I have lost in time attachment to what he could bring. How we started to be two individuals, yes living together and interdependent and in love — but on two separate journeys. 

“I remember thinking we were soul mates, we would be best friends, and we would travel the world together.

We would endlessly explore France. Road trips, the sun, lightness, adventure, and you.

I also remember thinking that now that I was with you, you would be my joy—and that I was saved, and that I would be happy, because now I was with you.

You see, I was used to plenty of space, freedom, and autonomy as a single woman. But when we started to dive deeper as a couple, I think I started to lose this: I started to need you.

Love is fanciful, as attachment is.

I was starting to make promises to myself through you.

I was starting to feel better, not because of myself, but because of you.

It is an illusion to think that people heal us.

Men are not there to fill voids, in truth.

It is a princess dream to think that one day, a knight on a white horse will come for rescue.

It was a maiden mistake to think that a man can truly change a woman’s life, and that woman can be fed through man.

So I have stopped needing you. And I think this is for the best.

…”

Read more Here. 

 

A Love Letter to the Man who Never Came Back.

This is a post about my own Twin Flame journey.

“You know you really love someone when you don’t hate them for breaking your heart.” ~ Unknown

It relates our story.

It is a love letter to the man who never came back. It is a love letter to maybe the most important love of my life — but we never got closure.

Read an extract below:

“When we met, I was engaged and my whole life was on the other side of the world, so at first I resisted you. A new chapter of my life was starting and I could feel it, but I couldn’t acknowledge it and allow you in.

You insisted. I told you I needed time to think. You kept being there. You were an energy, a calling. I was drawn to your spirit, to your soul, to your words. The first night that we made love, I felt guilty but this was only a side note, because what I had been looking for was you. With a capital Y.

Nobody had ever clicked with me that way. I thought you would be my all: my hero, my husband, my best friend, my soul lover.

During this trip to Cambodia, I would travel often outside of the city. I would think of you daily. What a life could be like with you. Why you felt so similar to me, yet distant and ethereal. Almost unreal.

In fact, you were too good to be true.

The power of our possible union made it almost unrealistic.

But I couldn’t be fully there with you yet either. I had to let go of the rest of my life. I travelled back to France. You texted while the taxi was driving back home. I thought I had to make a decision. The more I was avoiding feeling you, the more you were there—in my body, in my heart, like pink honey in my thoughts.

In time, the desire that I had to be with you won over everything else. I quit the rest of my life to be with you.

This is when you said no.

But the leap was worth it. Otherwise, I would have spent a lifetime regretting you.”

Go Here to read the full post.

Much love,

Sophie

 

On Trauma Bonding: Free Yourself From Unhealthy Attachment.

I have written a new blog about trauma bonds: its roots, why it affects some of us and not others, how it takes hold and implements within our nervous system, and how to free ourselves from it. 

Please click here to read it! 

Feel free to comment, share, or send me an email with any questions, reactions or comments that you may have.

Much love,

Sophie

Extract below: 

“I’ve experienced trauma bonding several times already—mainly in the context of romantic relationships.

Of course, initially, I didn’t know that I was “trauma bonded.” I would have never imagined that trauma and love, or an idea of love, could be found in the same place.

Here in this article, I will refer to trauma bonding in the context of romantic relationships.

Trauma bonding takes hold easily when we have experienced these types of unhealthy attachments during our childhood. In fact, our nervous system is wired in such receptive ways precisely because we’ve been been there before. A child who has experienced abuse from a parent may, as an adult, have difficulties distinguishing, at the level of the nervous system, abuse with love.

If you were abused as a child, you had to internalize and bury your feelings of sadness, anger, unfairness, or hurt in order to be able to stay in that same environment and be still taken care of.

Your life depended on your parents and you weren’t self-reliant enough to break the bond—so you may have learned how to cope with your feelings by seeing them with rose-tainted glasses and not fully see the truth.

In some way, the child had to minimize or even deny the abuse that was happening in order to get the love, care, and attention that they needed from their caretakers.

“The capacity for dissociation enables the young child to exercise their innate life-sustaining need for attachment in spite of the fact that principal attachment figures are also principal abusers.” ~ Warwick Middleton

Later in life, the individual may still expect love and attention from someone who is simultaneously abusive to them, because they were trained to—and because as a child, eventually getting the love that they needed from their parents was the reward they were seeking after enduring more grueling cycles of distrust and fear.

To the adult brain that experienced abuse in childhood, red flags may feel like home.

….”

Please click here to go to the full post.

Twin Flame Readings Sales

Twin Flames Video call Reading: 55€

Twin Flame 3 Cards Reading: 33€

— Until this Saturday.

Send a message via the contact page to schedule ❤

One Day, At Last, I Recovered From You.

Dear friends,

Please find my new poetry relating how I eventually healed my own Twin Flame relationship, and let it go — in the sense of seeing the truth of it, giving it space, and giving it time.

Find the poem here. 

Extract: 

“I don’t know how many times within one’s life we are supposed to fall in love.

I don’t know if we are even supposed to fall in love that deeply once.

I don’t even know if this was sane, healthy, or intelligent.

But it did happen to me.

Once.

And it took a bunch of years to recover.

~

I still don’t know how I did it.

How I coped.

I still don’t know either why it hurt that much.

I remember that I healed through presence. Acknowledging that it was over.

I remember that I had to feel the loss and the longing and the ache fully to actually live again, breathe again, smile again.

I recall this time as a long, long voiceless tunnel.

At first the hope that I still had for us to resume would carry me forward. You were my morning thoughts, my afternoon dreams, my evening prayers.

The trust that I still had in you changing your mind would lift me through the days as some colourful, Christmas, dreamy songs.

We were both the past and the future.

After a few months, I started to feel the opposite way.

Hope was destroying me.

Your silence was rose thorns.

Waiting was hell.

I had to let it go.

I had to let you go.

…”

Go to the link to read more! ❤

When A King Enters Your Life, Be Ready

« When a King enters your life, be ready.

He’s not looking for a woman who’s still acts a child, but a woman all her own;

A Queen.

She’ll come with pride, and she’ll come with scars.

He will know this and will adore her all the more.

The tears that should never have been hers to bear, he will gently wipe away. Gladly and for good.

She will trust him because he is trustworthy.

She will receive his total devotion and respect.

And ladies, damn straight he’s going to make you laugh and experience joy like you’re a newborn freakin’ unicorn!!

:::::👑

When a king enters your life, best be ready to ROAR. He won’t claim you halfway but COMPLETELY and will tear down ANY barricades around your heart, no distance too close or too far, to be right by your side.

He’ll fight for you. He’ll wait for you. He’ll listen to you. He’ll reassure you. He’ll build a goddam kingdom for you.

Anything within his power he will give to you.

Not because he feels obligated but because his very instinct, primal urge, and deepest need propels him to.

And he’ll never leave you guessing how he feels.

Yes, he needs you.

And you, dear Queen, must show him with the confidence of your eternal, unstoppable grace and feminine light, that he is safe and that he is welcome. That he is desired, more than enough, and that you are crystal clear with a heart of gold that he is yours and that you, in turn, would move moons for him.

And with the authority of his own soul, he will assure you every day that you, his family and his life’s work are equals as his life’s greatest treasures he will work hard, and even die for. It’s in his bones. No question.

It is possible. And fucking real. Terrifying to the princess, yet satisfying, fortifying and nourishing to the Queen who knows the true value of true love (after her many battles both lost and won)

Ladies, PLEASE don’t sell yourself short with jesters or knights, and men who will only meet you halfway.

Be a Queen, who from her deepest Source, magnetizes her perfect King.

And let your heart be healed and revered in every way, every single day. »

– Catlin Narramore